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"There is no greater agony than bearing an untold story inside you." Maya Angelou
John Chapter three begins with a conversation between Jesus and Nicodemus. Jesus the Son of God in human form and Nicodemus a Pharisees and a ruler of the Jews. The conversation opens as follows:
Now there was a man of the Pharisees, named Nicodemus, a ruler of the Jews; this man came to Jesus by night and said to Him, “Rabbi, we know that you have come from God as a teacher; for no one can do these signs that You do unless God is with him.” Jesus answered and said to him, “Truly, truly, I say to you, unless one is born again he cannot see the kingdom of God”
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I have had some interesting “meeting” experiences. I say meeting because dating never occurred. Over the last six years, these meeting experiences have ranged from bizarre to enchanting but none have panned out. All of these men professed faith in Christ, and I should have known better.
The first guy was a coworker. Our job functions rarely met, so I didn’t interact with him frequently. After a few failed attempts to hang out with me, we finally ended up eating and talking. It was a no for me. I have rules about dating where I work, and I wasn’t interested. It was mostly because I wasn’t interested. We all know when you are interested in a guy the rules suddenly become flexible. He continued his pursuit and one day tells me that some time ago he had a vision from God. In that vision, he saw a brown skin woman with a small afro, and he knew that woman was his. I replied, “I do not have a small afro.” At this point, you must be thinking, “seriously?” I can’t make this up. I’d like to tell you that I recognized this tomfoolery for what it was immediately. I’d really like to tell you that, but it isn’t what happened. When he said this to me, it got me thinking. Up to that point, I had never had a man tell me he thought I was his wife by way of vision from God. And, if he had a vision from God, then it must be true. If it is true, then why don’t I feel that way about him? A few weeks later I told him that I would like to remain friends. So ensued months of folly. He started to treat me badly at work. He constantly disrespected my boundaries and was generally impossible. And with all this, I still tried to understand how God had given him this vision because who lies on God? Who I ask you? Who? I was so confused. I prayed and I prayed. “God, is this my husband?” He was a silent as the grave; He said nothing. One day my coworker said to me, “What can God tell you that you cannot see? If I were you, I would run away from that man with my shoes in my hands.” Sometimes you need someone to tell you what you already know. Like Celie, I ran. |